Dudetributes: A Sense of Confidence

Men do not often suffer from low self esteem. In fact, the concept of a "male ego" has been decried to the extent that assaulting it farther would seem banal and redundant. I do not intend to pummel a deceased stallion (if you permit the adaption of a nonsensical phrase - after all, why would anyone beat a living horse?), but I have chosen to elucidate upon a proper dudelike mentality regarding self esteem.

I would prefer to simply expound upon the positive aspects of a dudely sense of confidence, but I need to establish several initial qualifications.

I acknowledge that many men DO indeed have an issue with pride. (I could veraciously assail this glaring imperfection, but I have chosen to inspire and encourage because I believe this approach to be exponentially more effective).

Confidence is not equivalent to arrogance or pride. Arrogance is a distortion (more specifically an improper swelling) of confidence. In short, arrogance is confidence with a hernia.

It is possible to "take pride" in something without being arrogant, just like it is possible to take a break without being lazy - the key is moderation.

A Dudelike Sense of Confidence

With these thoughts in mind, I can proceed to an explanation of the dudetribute of confidence. There are two components of a proper, balanced sense of confidence: confidence in the dude you are, and confidence in the dude you are not.

Confidence in the Dude You Are

First, dudes know (and like) who they are. This means they have an accurate perception of themselves, and they are not afraid to be that person. For example, dudes are confident enough to use their talents and natural abilities. How tragic it would have been if Mozart was too ashamed to share his gift of music? Or if Thomas Edison had lost confidence after his first few attempts at the light bulb? Dudes are not crippled by the possibility of failure or the fear of public shame, but have the self assurance to overcome in pursuit of their goals. After all, a person's worth has no correlation to public opinion.

Confidence in the Dude You Aren't

Concisely stated, dudes have personal standards about who they are about which they are unwilling to compromise. They do not allow others to influence their convictions with faulty arguments about "fitting in" and "everyone is doing it." (Note: this idea extends beyond just doing drugs and having sex). Guys who merely "follow the gang" demonstrate self assurance with properties similar to Silly Putty. At some point, guys like this need to dude up and embrace their individual masculinity. A second aspect of being confident in the dude you aren't involves not being too arrogant to try new things. Dudes are not intimidated by the embarrassment and initial awkwardness of unfamiliar things. They are confident enough to know that their worth is independent of their ability to perform an activity or task.

Practical Confidence Applications (in one sentence or less):

Confidence is the ability to shut your facial abyss while being criticized.

Confidence is the ability to laugh when you get shanked.

Confidence is the ability to shake your opponents hand after a tough loss.

Confidence is the ability to give credit when/where it is due.

Confidence is the ability to ask for assistance (or directions).

Confidence is the ability to look anyone in the eye when shaking hands.

Confidence is the ability to let someone else lead, (but be willing to take the reigns if they screw up).

Dude out,

-C.R.